Turning 23

My birthday is in eight days

Therefore I’m thinking about age–

Whatever that means

One year closer to

death

One year closer to

wisdom

Ancestry

Heritage

Remembrance

Honoring the past

Looking at the future

Moving forward

Nostalgia is for the weak of heart

I was born at the beginning of time

Long hair flying, feet encircled with bells

Fire burned, and I awoke

Into a life, celebrated

Good magic happened that day on the mountain

It rained–to purify

The rivers overflowed and I drank

From the crown of Vishnu

I look into the mirror

I look death in the face and laugh

I don’t know who I’m becoming

Who are you

I ask

Who are you

My world has been derailed

My existence is being warped

I look into the mirror and my

mother stares back into my eyes

I like what I see

I laugh when people ask me what I want to be

when I grow up–

I’m not ever growing up

I was born of this earth

I have her skin–

Salty as the ocean

I have her mouth–

Hungry for truth

I have her eyes–­

Seeing the beauty within each of you

I have her temper­–

Like a hurricane I dance upon the heads of the damned

Singing the songs of the wind

I bathe in sunshine

Who’s that knocking at my door

It’s stagnant as a question

It’s sharp as a knife

Doubt

What do you do when someone else

is living the life you’ve always dreamed about

What do I do when they’re living my life

How come I can’t just be happy

How come I have to judge and compare

myself to everything and everyone

I’m not as tough as I say I am

I cry too often

I miss him

I want to know God

I want to know myself

Birth is to come into the light

To breath of this air–

Lungs turning blue in the hands of my father

Cradled in safety

Encircled with warmth

Birth is to detach–

Eventually standing alone

Dancing this flavor of existence

With age

I am capable