The Italians say, “Per dare alla luce,” to give birth, literally, “to give to the light.”
Today is my birthday, and a time to celebrate life, which includes the cycle of death. A celebration of both giving to the light, and leaving one’s material body. A time for reflection, and at essence, a reality check. I woke up with the light this morning, laying, curled under the covers, just breathing, waiting, listening for the dawn to wake up. I eventually rolled out of bed, dressed, and sat in mediation while my mind wondered to what I wanted to eat for breakfast and what possibilities this next year might bring. As my thoughts went from pancakes with butter and honey to New York City, the actualization, the experience of “Just this,” entered my body. This is it, I thought, this is all we have. This moment right, now, and right now, and right now. How awesome! I smiled as I thought about the great cosmic joke this life really is. I am thrilled to be alive, and knowing that I have so many people in my life who exude love.
My roommate did a Tarot reading with me last night, and one of the cards I pulled was the Joker, which told me to “Accept the humor of the situation, all situations.” He is the Enlightened Play of the Game of Life, and it is due time we all have a bit of humor in our lives. When things get stuck, there’s nothing like a good laugh to break the stagnation, cutting through. So here’s my joke for today, (it’s a true story):
“Hey dad, I’ve been thinking of writing more than just poetry and “meaningful pros” on my blog page.”
“Well, you have to start someplace.”
“Yes, but what do you think? It will be ‘Life According to Shinay,’ you know, my opinion on life, everything. Do you think it will inspire people? Not that anyone reads my blog besides my mother…”
“Well, you know what they say about opinions, don’t you?”
“What?”
“They’re like assholes, everyone has one.”
We laughed long and hard about that one. Both are true, and we all have to start someplace–remember the first job you ever had, babysitting, dressing up as Elmo in July and dancing along side the highway, selling handmade cards and lemonade. There will be no experience, unless we make it happen, so simply, start.
I was first encouraged many years ago to write a blog, and I have been dabbling since 2007, writing musings about life when I feel like I have something important to say. Yet lately that’s just not cutting it. It’s not enough to wait for inspiration to hit and then write it down, hoping someone might read it. That’s not enough. There’s urgency in my heart to create, to give, to learn, to acquire knowledge, to give that knowledge back, to perpetuate the circle of love, to be a student of life, therefore, it has come time to “start” again. I have no credentials, no letters after my name, nothing to signify that you aught to trust anything that I put on paper, yet I have lived for 24 years under the influence of Intention and Integrity and Unconditional Love. I am a 20-somehting woman, with a few insights now and again. I grew up with parents wanting something different for their children. I am surrounded with love that is unconditional, I am loved by many and feared by a few (or so I’d like to think). I am human and have the same cravings as the two women indulging in their sandwiches and wine at the table to my right. I have the same dark thoughts as that man, hunched down in the big leather chair in the corner, glaring at the world. I like to write, I like people, and I’m prepared to live by example. I want to offer the world a bit of what I have in my life. Here’s to love and light!
On this day of my birth I have chosen
you, and you, and YOU to sit with me in
this seat of Divine knowledge and forgive-
ness. I am choosing to forgive the weak
and needy because they know no better.
I am choosing to love the condemned
because they have made choices, human
choices. I am choosing to sit with the
arrogant, the angry, the foolish, and
the insane, they exist in this world, as
as I. I am no different than the
guilty.
Paint me a picture of your God, I would
like to see what you see. Draw me lines, sing
me a song, dance me a dance, pranam to
the mountain or wave your hands in time with
the stereo booming through car speakers,
let Grace breath you. Collect friends who will be
your mirror, when you forget how wonder-
ful you are. Use your words wisely, because
that’s the last thing people will remember
about you. Move with integrity, and
know that actions speak louder then words. Be
brave, life is precious. Be courageous, life
is grand. Be pretentious, everyone is.
Be gentle, be kind, be intentional
with your love. Take nothing for granted. And
as a very wise woman wrote, “Wear red.”
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