When all the running stops

We're left with silence, which is uncomfortable. This is not a place a want to live, but it is a place I need to visit every once in a while. Sit still. Get quiet. Stop everything. And listen. Heartbeat, breath, car noises on the highway, tired feet, head ache, birds, flies, wanting arises, judgement arises. It's all in the mind. Get quiet. Get closer. Stop worrying. 

Sometimes...

Late nights are the only way we can access another part of ourselves.
Sometimes eating a shit ton of chocolate is actually good for us.
Sometimes we need to be a little harder on ourselves, or a little easier.
Sometimes taking a bath in the middle of the afternoon is okay.
Sometimes saying "No" is appropriate.
Sometimes I'm afraid to speak up.
Sometimes I want to scream at the top of my lungs.
Sometimes flowers, sometimes a scowl.
Always give more love.
Never take a man away from another woman.

I co-authored a book...

Women Challenge the Lie

A Little Ditty by Jesse

My Baby don't like certain places
because they're all filled up with torn-up faces.
Wonderin' 'round this big ol' world
looking for a place to call my home.
Don't have a job,
don't have no money,
but we sure like drinkin' tea and honey.
Surrounded by so many God-damn people,
but we are all so very alone. 

Lunch with Grandma

We stand together,
the four of us, generations apart,
in my grandma's living room
smiling.

We share the same blood,
the same high cheek bones,
round face, freckles, eye shape,
and laugh.

A warmth runs through me as our bodies
confess to one another of our shortcomings
and our desires from
lives lived apart.

I see myself in these women.
Carol, Arlene, Grandma, and Me.
I have lived a very different life,
removed from most of them.

Yet we are still the same.
I can say I know them
because I know
myself.